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Ask A Lawyer: How to change child custody arrangements PDF Print E-mail
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Written by Matt Hopkins   
EDMOND — Q: My ex-wife and I want our teenage son to live with me instead of his mother. How do we make the change legal?

A:
When a court makes custody arrangements, it considers many factors. Which parent has the best work schedule to provide care for the child on a daily basis? If the child is older, does he have a preference? Who has been the child’s primary caregiver so far in life? Do the parents agree where the child should live? Has one parent been behaving in a way that is less healthy for the child? The central question is, “What is in the best interest of the child?” Here, the actual desires of the parents are relevant, but the well-being of the child takes the front seat. Hopefully, the parents and the court get it right, and everyone adjusts to the new arrangement over time.

But life changes. We get new jobs and move to new states. Children very quickly grow older, and sometimes their needs change with them. Some children begin expressing desires to change the living arrangements. One or both parents may enter into a new marriage. The original equation changes somehow. The question is whether custody arrangements can be altered to reflect the changes in life. As you might expect, the answer depends on the circumstances.

When both parents are in agreement that the change should be made, courts will usually put it in place. In this situation, the parents should file a joint motion to modify custody and present an agreed order to the court. The court will, in most cases, sign the order and the change will be official.

But what if the parents don’t agree?    

In order for the court to modify custody when both parents do not agree, there must have been a change in circumstances. And not any change will do. The change must be substantial, material and permanent. In most cases, these factors are easy to evaluate. The change is substantial if it has some impact on the life of the child that is major and affects him in some significant way. The change is material if it bears upon the well-being of the child. It is permanent if — well — it is permanent. That is, it is unlikely to change back. If these factors are present, the court can change the custody arrangement even if both parents do not agree.

 



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